Then Jesus shouted out again, and he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain in the Temple was torn in two, from top to bottom. The earth shook, rocks split apart,... Matthew 27:50-51
I have been reading through the Bible chronologically this year, and this morning brought me to the account of the crucifixion of Jesus. As I read of Pilate's failure to act on what he knew to be true (He knew very well that the Jewish leaders had arrested Jesus out of envy. v.18) , I felt an anger and indignation that this key leader would order the flogging and allow the execution of a man he knew to be innocent.
And I continued to read Matthew's account of Jesus' death.
Then the reading guide I have been following took me to the book of Mark, where I read the same story all over again, again became frustrated with Pilate's response, but at the same time caught myself just basically skimming through the reading, as I had just read almost the identical words from Matthew.
And that is when it struck me.
While we all know the recorded details of all of Christ's suffering leading up to and including His crucifixion, what truly disturbs me today is not an ancient politician's failure to act - it is my own failure to act. How can I read the account of my Lord's torturous final hours and not be brought to tears? How can I know the truth that His death was what I deserved, and not be totally broken and humbled at the great love extended to me? I tear up when I ask for prayer for acquaintances who have cancer; I weep at the loss of people I don't even know; I cry when I read about a fictional character being mistreated in a novel; I have even shed tears at the death of a cartoon character in a Disney movie! And yet I read the true account of my Savior's life and blood poured out for me as if it is simply history? This is tragic!
And so my prayer today is that God would soften my obviously calloused heart, and heal me of the desensitization that has occurred in my life. May I never again speak of Christ's great sacrifice in such a matter-of-fact way, as though it is nothing more than the historical basis for my faith.
"God, give me a sense of brokenness and humility every time I think of the price that was paid for my disobedience to Your word. And when I speak of Your Son, may it be with the kind of passion that comes with a deep sense of gratitude at the gift I have been given. Re-sensitize me, Lord!"
...Just a thought...
