Full Circle

“For thus says the Lord: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place.”     Jeremiah 29:10

Sometimes God’s promises take time.  That’s the condensed version of what the Lord has put on my heart today.  His timing is not my timing.  His promises will be fulfilled.  It will happen in HIS time.

You can stop reading right there if you'd like.  The rest is mostly my rambling my way back to that conclusion - that God's timing and mine are different.  Or feel free to continue.  All the gory details are below:

In 2012, we unplugged the J2911 bus and moved south.  We came with big dreams and high hopes.  We were ill-prepared for what we would find. 

Initially, I was thrilled to be back in sunny Florida, in the land of my birth.  We found a great little campground near the shore, needing a place to stay for a couple of weeks while we looked for a home.  I anticipated going to work within a few days, expecting that with my skill set, finding gainful employment would be a cinch.  I had picked out the car that I wanted to buy, as we would need two vehicles to get around.  Life was looking great!

July 2012

Soon thereafter, life was not looking great.  We were broke.  I could not find work.  We could not afford a home.  The campground was substantially raising their rates in anticipation of the snowbird migration, so we would have to move.  (And I’d suffered an abscessed tooth, further depleting our resources and optimism.)  And on top of that, we had not been able to find a local church, and we had no support system locally.

As the dreams began to die, a college friend of my brother was contacted, and arrangements were made for us to move our bus to a “senior” manufactured housing development and live there for a few months.  In other words, we went to live at the old folks’ trailer park.

Jeff and I both eventually found work, neither of us making much more than minimum wage.  Jeff had to drop out of flight school, because we could not afford it any longer.  Millie spent her days confined to the interior of the bus, independently working her way through her junior year of high school, waiting for me to get home in the afternoons to answer any questions that came up.  We seldom ventured outdoors during daylight hours, as young people and big dogs were technically not welcome at the trailer park, and the anticipation of the scowls we would encounter was often enough to keep us inside.

To say that was a hard year would be an understatement.  Discouragement and disillusionment set in quickly and deeply.  The isolation was almost unbearable at times.  But we pressed on.

In due time – several months after the move – I got up very early on a Saturday morning to try to get some groceries first thing before the stores got crowded.  I arrived, only to find out that they didn’t even open until 9:00 and it was barely 8.  So, since it was Saturday, I figured I’d go try to find a yard sale to explore.  I had a whopping three or four dollars in my purse!

It took a few minutes for me to get my bearings, as I was still relatively new to the neighborhood.  Eventually, I chased a yard sale sign to a church in a warehouse-looking building.  I had no trouble spending the entirety of the little cash I had!

Something very exciting happened that day, besides adding another pair of shoes to my wardrobe.  I was invited to church!  The significance of that simple invitation restored for me the tiniest bit of hope.  You see, in the 3-4 months we’d been in Florida, no one had invited us to church.  There were churches everywhere, but we’d not gotten a single invitation.

We struggled through another nine months or so in St. Petersburg.  It never really got any easier.  The neighbors never accepted us at the trailer park.  I learned to navigate public transportation, the cute little car a distant dream.  And we got connected in that little church from the yard sale.  Then, Jeff had an opportunity to accept a promotion at work if we would relocate to North Carolina, and we were gone.

Fast forward, 7 ½ years.  Mostly hard years.  Seven more locations.  A lot of changes.

And here we are, full circle.  Back in the Tampa Bay area.  Back in a house with wheels attached.  Back in an old people’s trailer park (technically, this one is considered an “RV resort for active seniors,” but the view is all too familiar).

Today's view

When I realized where we were going to be moving, I may have had a little meltdown. (And I may or may not be having another one as I sit here putting this all into words!)  But I have a hope from the Lord.  It was not some great word, or tangible confirmation.  But there was a gentle whisper. 

“It will be different.” 

In this season that feels all too familiar in many ways, the Lord has reminded me that it is different.  That is (at least partially) what I believe He wants to teach me in this season.

We’re not so isolated this time.  Our friends live in their RV right across the street from us.  And the other neighbors have been reasonably friendly in the three days we’ve been here.  It probably helps that we don’t have a big dog and a teenager living at home, and that we’re technically not far off from qualifying as “active seniors” (which I refuse to think about for very long!).

That car that I dreamed of buying those 7 ½ years ago is the car I now drive.  It’s a different color than I was dreaming of years ago, but I feel so blessed when I get to drive it.  It serves as a tangible reminder that my God cares even about my silly dreams.  He reminds me that His timing is so very different from mine!

May 2019

We went back to our church Sunday.  I barely recognized it!  That little church where we met with maybe 100-150 people on a good day when we last lived in the area now holds two services each Sunday with over 800 people in attendance!  I barely recognized the place!  I was in awe at the work the Lord has done in that no-longer-little church over these past 7 ½ years!

And there was that gentle whisper again.  “What I have done in that church, I am able to do in your life.  I want to grow you, and bless you, and expand your reach.” 

It was not a tangible, spoken word – just an understanding spoken into my heart.  It’s a call to worry less and trust more.  A call to focus and do the work that is in my heart to do, and to dream bigger as I do the work.  The same God Who did not stop with just filling up a little church sanctuary, but Who tore down walls and turned the church on end to reach more people in Pinellas County, Florida is the same God who brought me back to the hard place to remind me that He does all things well – in His time.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.     Ecclesiastes 3:11 ESV

I don’t really know what it’s going to look like, how it’s going to happen, or how long it will take.  But I serve a God who does know.  He’s good.  And I can trust Him.  So really, that is all I need to know.

…Just a thought…