What You Were Made For

Then Moses said to the people of Israel, “See, the Lord has called by name Bezalel the son of Uri, son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah; and he has filled him with the Spirit of God, with skill, with intelligence, with knowledge, and with all craftsmanship...                 Exodus 35:30-31

Last Wednesday was kind of a rough day.  After a long day of work, there were appointments and storms and other situations that were generating stress, and my very energetic dog was getting on my nerves in a pretty significant way.  Ultimately, I got frustrated enough with her indoor shenanigans that I took her out for a nice long walk - puddles and all.

We ended up at the little dog park in our community, and I released her to run.  And she did, for a bit.  And then I had guilt.

When we began considering adopting a dog, I was specifically looking for a dog that would have the energy and stamina to accompany me on runs.  Mission accomplished!

Only, I haven't been running lately.  Workdays leave me weary and frustrated.  My joints ache, and there just isn't a lot of time or motivation for activities that seem non-essential.  So, what I find myself wanting right now is a dog that will just lay down on the couch beside me and snuggle and rest her head in my lap and bring some calm to my often-frazzled nerves.

But I adopted a runner.

And so, bright and early Thursday morning, I dug out my running shoes and we went for a run.  Friday morning, we did the same.

A couple of notables were observed:  

Bailey is an excellent runner.  When we go for walks, she likes to scan the whole area, shifting from my left to right and around trees, posts, etc., until we find ourselves quite tangled.  She often feels the need to "stop, drop, and roll" in the grass, and to pause to observe every squirrel, lizard, dog, or person we may encounter.  When we run, however, she is focused and stays easily to the left - no problem.

Running brings out Bailey's calm.  After a run, she can just come inside our tiny home and settle.  This is good for everyone!

Bailey, post-run

Running also brings out my calm.  I have long known that running is great for my mental health.  Lately, though, I have had no interest in running.  I have attributed this to the physical aches, pains, and tiredness that have accompanied my new job.  It seemed a valid excuse, for indeed the physical toll of a day on my feet at work is far greater than I've felt after a long run.  I simply could not imagine trying to run on a workday.  

Which brings me to the heart of the lesson I am learning in this experience...

There is value in doing what we are made for.

Bailey is a strong and energetic girl.  She is about 40 pounds of solid muscle, which doesn't seem like much until she hits you with it!  She is the proverbial "bull in a china closet," causing unintentional havoc in the house as she tries to work off a little energy.  But outside, on a run or in the park, she has the opportunity to freely do what she was made to do.

I enjoy being creative.  I've been drawing, writing, sewing, imagining, and making things for as long as I can remember.  

And I love kids.  Every time I serve in the children's ministry at our church, I feel like I am exactly where I belong.  I am energized, inspired, and joyful.  

But I find myself working a job that does not hit any of my interests or gifts.  I actually got reprimanded recently for applying a slight bit of creativity to an otherwise mundane task!  

So I am frustrated.  Going to work each day is more of a chore than I can ever recall in any other of the myriad of jobs I've had over the years.

I once was encouraged by a pastor friend to "be careful of trying to work outside of the area of your giftedness."  That's not to say that we can realistically only do the things in life that we are good at or feel called to do (though I personally think that would be great!).  He was simply saying that when we work within our gifts, this is where we will find ourselves most effective and satisfied.

I'm not quitting my job just yet, though most days I'd really like to.  Still, I find myself searching internet job sites almost daily, looking for a job that is more in keeping with my gifts and interests.  

In the meantime, I'm trying to be more purposeful in using my free time to indulge in more creative pursuits.  I still have hopes of completing that book I started nearly two years ago.  I have several other writing projects bouncing around in my head and in my collection of notebooks.  I have sewing projects in progress, and I even took some time the other day to paint a picture.  

And I am praying.

My heart is to serve, and at a most basic level that is what I do at my job each day.  And so I find myself daily asking the Lord for the grace and endurance to be faithful in the little things and for His help to keep my frustration and discouragement in check at work.

Still, I find myself longing for the opportunity and freedom to spend more time doing what I was made to do.  

When the time came to build the tabernacle, God did not just instruct Moses to look for volunteers.  He gave him a name - the name of a man He had specifically gifted for the tasks at hand.  In fact, the Lord gifted a variety of craftsmen with different gifts and skills needed for constructing the tabernacle.  

Bezalel's story gives me hope.

Like all of the other Israelites, Bezalel was not far-removed from the days of slavery in Egypt.  Like the others, he'd been wandering in the wilderness since the Lord had brought the children of Israel out of Egypt.  He'd daily gathered manna and moved his tent from place to place.  Bezalel walked through the mundane and necessary and frustrating days and weeks and months and years - waiting for opportunity.

Opportunity eventually came.  The Lord brought purpose to the skill, intelligence, knowledge, and craftmanship with which He'd gifted Bezalel.  He set Bezalel free to create!

Perhaps, like me, you are longing for the freedom to do what you feel like you were made to do.  There are plenty of self-help gurus out there that will talk to you about visualizing and pursuing your dreams.  In frustrating seasons, I would encourage you not to pursue your dreams, but to pursue the Dream Giver.  Trust Him.  Trust His timing.  That's what I am encouraging myself to do in this season.

Remember Bezalel.  

Be ready.  Be filled. 

 And as God gives opportunity, get busy doing what you were made for.

...Just a thought...

Remember

I cry out, “My splendor is gone!  Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!”  The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words.  I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss.

Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends!  His mercies never cease.  Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”     Lamentations 3:18-24 NLT

I did a lot of driving last week...

We have a family reunion in Alabama every third Saturday of July.  Lots of factors went into the decision of whether or not to attend this year, but ultimately, I made it. 

The journey began on Wednesday with a drive from Ocala, Florida to Brevard, North Carolina where my mom lives.  Though she is perfectly capable of driving herself places, I am not comfortable with her driving alone from North Carolina to Alabama.  So, I went to pick her up and drive her down.  

Thursday was spent debating the wisdom of going to Alabama after all.  Several family members were ill, so we knew that turnout for the reunion would be low.  It was a long way to drive knowing that we would miss seeing a lot of people.  Ultimately, we decided that we would rather see some of the family than to see none of the family, and so we determined to go.

Friday found us driving to my cousin's house near Birmingham.  We stayed the night there, enjoying a lovely visit.

Up early Saturday morning and we were off to Lawley, the site of the annual gathering.  We enjoyed the day visiting with family members and eating too much food.  We walked a bit in the cemetery, visiting my Daddy's grave, and then we got back on the road.  We arrived back in North Carolina right around midnight.

Sunday morning, I loaded up and headed for home.  I found myself at home in Florida around 9pm, tired, but thankful to have been able to make the journey.

I include all those details basically to make the point that I spent four days of the past six on the road.  More specifically, on each of my four days of driving, I passed the site of our bus accident from a few years ago.  

I believe it was around 2005 (?) that we were traveling in our first bus from North Carolina to Georgia when we were struck from behind by an 18-wheeler.  That event became a significant marker in our Jeremiah 29:11 Ministries journey.  We began to remember things based on whether they had happened before or after "the awful thing."  Thankfully, despite the intensity of the accident, we walked away from that day with no serious injuries.  But our lives were pretty upside-down for a while.

Traditional wisdom dictates that we should try our best to forget the bad times of the past.  I struggle with that because I have a brain that works overtime to remember troublesome details while quickly forgetting more important things - like the name of the person I met 30 seconds ago!  In Philippians 3:13, Paul even suggests that there is wisdom in forgetting the past to look ahead.

But the prophet Jeremiah recognized that there was also some value in remembering.  Jeremiah saw some really bad stuff and experienced very difficult circumstances in his life.  It was truly "an awful time" for him.  He acknowledges in Lamentations that he cannot forget the bad things that happened to him.  It's kind of right in the title of the book...

But --

Even in his grief, Jeremiah had hope.  He was not blind to his circumstances.  He didn't adopt a "positive mental attitude" approach to life.  He did not try to pretend that everything was fine when it definitely was not.  

But Jeremiah remembered the nature of God. 

He remembered the bad, but he also remembered the good.  Jeremiah remembered that God's faithfulness was not negated by his own circumstances.  Jeremiah recognized that his present situation was not all that existed.  

When the prophet took an objective look at his life, he did not say, "Everything is great!"  Things were not at all okay.  Jeremiah hurt, and he grieved.  

He acknowledged reality.

Personally, I am prone to only go halfway when I try to be "realistic" in my assessment of life.  I look at the circumstances of my life and my world, and my response is basically, "Yeah, it really is pretty bad.  But it is what it is."

It is what it is.

That's my go-to phrase in this season.  I hear a lot of other people making that acknowledgement too.

Circumstances are what they are.  The world is pretty messed up.  Our country is definitely a hot mess!

But you know what else "is what it is"?

God.  He is the original I Am.  And He has not changed because He does not change.  He is Who He is!  

It is the nature of God to be faithful.  It is His nature to love.  And His mercies are new each day.

And so, whatever the circumstances, we can have hope.

Every time I drive past the weigh stations on I-85 in north Georgia, I remember the awful thing that happened there.  I remember a day filled with all kinds of fear, frustration, uncertainty, and pain.  But then I remember that even in that circumstance, my God was faithful.  He has not changed.  

He will not change.

And so, this day, let me encourage you - it's okay to remember.  It's legitimate, even as a Christ-follower, to acknowledge that your life may not be going exactly the way you'd expected.  Feeling frustrated and disappointed doesn't make you a bad Christian.  It makes you an honest human.

Just be sure as you are remembering that you do not stop halfway through the process.  Life is hard, yes.  But God is faithful, always.

Hope in Him.

...Just a thought...