2024 Reflections

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits.  Psalm 103:2

As the year is winding down, I’ve been doing some reflecting…

God is so faithful!  You could stop reading right there because that’s the heart of what I wanted to share with you today.  God is faithful!

But, of course, I’m not going to stop there.  I’m a writer, after all, and I sat down to try to write something today.  I’ve kind of gotten out of the habit of writing regularly, and this is my meager attempt to rekindle some bit of momentum.

At the beginning of the year, I adopted a word for 2024.  That’s not really something I’ve been in the habit of doing.  I don’t think everybody need to have a “word of the year” or any such thing.  But a particular word had come to mind as I was evaluating life at the end of 2023 going into 2024, and that word was “content.”  And so I thought to make that my focus.

It’s a two-fold word, both meanings very applicable to my goals and struggles, and so #content2024 was my plan.  As a writer/blogger my goal was to produce more content (noun: the topics or matter treated in a written work).  In life, I recognized my need to stop striving and worrying and simply learn to be content (adjective: satisfied).

So how did I do?

Well, In terms of producing content, not so good.  I posted to my Susan Becker Writes Facebook page pretty regularly all the way into February.  I updated the Invisible Woman blog eleven times.  I did not finish writing a single book, though at this moment I have three incomplete works in progress that I really do intend to finish someday. 

As for getting more content in life… well, I suppose that will always be a daily struggle.  But these past few days, I’ve really just been in awe of what my great God has done this year!

We ended 2023 living in a travel trailer in west Texas.  My Christmas tree was about two feet tall, and I remember this time last year chatting (complaining, more accurately) with the Lord about how someday I’d like to have a full-size Christmas tree again.  But a bigger Christmas tree would require a house bigger than the roughly 250 square feet we were living in, and I really didn’t see much hope for that happening (which I’m certain I also complained to the Lord about!).

It was surprisingly cold in west Texas, something I hadn’t really understood before we moved there.  I mean, I should have known.  We’d visited often enough to know that they actually do have winter out there.  But it came earlier than I expected, and it was lasting much longer than I would have liked.

But

Getting content meant I had to embrace it all - which was especially challenging when we returned home from a trip in January, and it was FOUR degrees and all our pipes in the trailer were frozen!   But I digress.

I had some really sweet times with the Lord early in the year during which I determined to just get happy with what I had.  The fifth wheel was absolutely adequate for two people to live in.  It was truly a blessing to have a very low lot rent in the economy of 2024, and so I set out to clean up, spruce up, and generally try to find ways to make our little home more comfortable and more functional. 

As for west Texas, cold or not, it was home.  I had some great people to work with.  We were close to family.  We were attending a great church. 

So I decided to really work on putting in some roots. 

I had just signed up to join a ladies' Bible study group when Jeff owned up to the fact that he was looking at jobs back in Florida.  Not only was he looking, but he already had an interview lined up.

So many details, emotions, and lots of stuff in between, but I’ll spare you.  The point was this:  when I stopped striving so hard against where the Lord had put me, He flipped the script on me!

Fast forward to today, and I’m writing to you from the desk in my home in south Florida – from one of my homes in south Florida.  One year out from feeling like I would spend the rest of my life in a tiny trailer in some trailer park or another, I’m enjoying life in a townhome community with a pool, a fitness center, and – my favorite – a fancy coffee machine in the clubhouse.  I have a real kitchen with a full-size refrigerator, two actual bedrooms, two and a half actual bathrooms – one of which has a bathtub (!!) -  and I never have to put chemicals in the toilet or go outside to pull a chute to drain the holding tanks!  Unbelievable, right?

But that’s just part of the story.

Several days each week, we get to live in a four bedroom, three bath house with a fenced yard and an even bigger kitchen.  And not only that – it has a Jacuzzi tub!  It’s one of those little details that reminds me of just how well the Lord knows me and how much He loves me that He would throw in that little luxury for me.

The details are fun, but somewhat irrelevant to the point. 

God works on His own timetable and in His own way.  And His ways are ALWAYS better than the ideas I described to Him!

So in this Christmas season, it has just been so fun to just bask in the blessings, and sit in awe at what God has done.  There are still struggles, to be sure.  It’s just a different set of struggles than we had 365 days ago.  There always will be struggles this side of heaven, which I think is just a bit of what the Lord has been trying to teach me for so long. 

But I really just want to encourage you to seek contentment, whatever circumstance life may have you in at this moment.  Life is often hard, but God is always good.

...Just a thought...

Permanent and Forever

Remember, these instructions are a permanent law that you and your descendants must observe forever.     Exodus‬ ‭12‬:‭24‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This verse came up in my Bible study lesson Sunday morning, and it really got my attention.

PERMANENT.

FOREVER.

Those are strong words!

That’s what got me thinking…

There was no instruction that Passover should only be observed until the coming of Messiah.

But most Christians don’t really celebrate Passover.

“Well, Jesus’ death on the cross fulfilled Passover.”

Yes. 

That’s what I’ve always heard and believed.  But if Passover is to be PERMANENT and FOREVER, what does that mean?  I guess it means PERMANENT and FOREVER.  Last time I checked, forever includes yesterday, all the days before, tomorrow, and all the days after.  And it includes today.

So what does that mean for me?  Am I supposed to be killing a lamb every year and eating unleavened bread?

Maybe…?  But I don’t think so.

Passover itself was observed with a feast, yes.  But the actual Passover was about the application of blood above and beside the door of a house, a sign that those inside were to be “passed over” by the destroyer.

Those whose dwelling place was marked with the blood would live.  Those whose dwelling was not marked with blood would die.

Well, having lived a pretty nomadic lifestyle for most of my adult life, I understand that “homes” and “dwellings” can take a lot of different forms.  And as I ponder what my fellow apartment-dwellers might think if I splattered blood on the top and sides of my doorway…  well, I feel like that might be frowned upon…

So as I considered this instruction for PERMANENT, FOREVER observance of Passover, it occurred to me…

Where or what is my dwelling place?

Well, in John 5, Jesus gave instructions that His followers should “abide” in Him.  “Abide” means to live, right - to stay?  So then, Christ Himself has become my dwelling place!

When the Lord looks on my Dwelling Place - His Son - what does He see?

And there it is! 

The blood of Jesus is the PERMANENT and FOREVER sign that the Lamb has been sacrificed so that I can live!

The blood has been applied.  My dwelling is marked.  My life is saved.  FOREVER.

Hallelujah!

Seems like a message for a different holiday…  

But, the fact is that without the Crucifixion and Resurrection, the birth of Jesus would hold little meaning.  After all, babies are born all the time.  But only one came to earth, lived a sinless life, and sacrificed His life for ours.  And so, this Christmas, I’m thinking about Passover and the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world!

…Just a thought…

Next-Level Love

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”     John‬ ‭13‬:‭34‬ ‭ESV‬

If you use YouVersion, you may have already seen this verse today.  It’s the “verse of the day,” and it’s a good one.  Obviously.  They’re all good.

So here’s what’s on my mind this morning:

Have you ever stopped to consider the many things that we are not commanded to do?

I’ve been mulling this over for a couple of hours now, and I keep coming back to this thought.  There are a lot of things that I do that nobody has to “command” me to do.  

I drank coffee this morning - actually I’m still drinking coffee.  I didn’t have to be commanded to do that.  There is no command in Scripture, “Thou shalt drink coffee.”  It’s not there.  It’s not necessary.

No command is given, “eat junk food.”  I do that too - often - and without being told to do so.

Sleep.  No command.  I just do it.

Breathe. Eat. Play.

There are no commandments to do these things.  Our instincts for self-preservation and self-indulgence drive us to do these things.

But love…

That’s a different story.

My instincts don’t always kick in there.  Loving doesn’t always come naturally.  Sometimes it takes effort.  Sometimes it takes A LOT of effort!

Jesus knew that (duh!).

So He made it a command.  He knew we wouldn’t just naturally want to do that.

But when He made this statement, Jesus said it was a NEW commandment…

He made this statement on the night He would be betrayed.  He said it after He’d washed the disciples’ feet and had His last supper with them.  Was this not already a command?

Well, we know that the Ten Commandments are all about loving God and loving others.  Jesus had previously summed up all the commandments in the two commandments to love God and love your neighbor (see Matthew 22:36-40).  So what’s NEW about this command?

This command was about next-level love.

Jesus’ command was “just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”  That’s a very specific kind of love.  

How does Jesus love?

He loves 

UNCONDITIONALLY

COMPLETELY

FREELY

SELFLESSLY

Jesus was expressing His love to a group of guys that were going to all do Him wrong before the night was over.  One was going to betray Him.  One was going to deny Him three times.  The rest were going to desert Him.  But here Jesus is, loving them. Serving them.  Encouraging them.

That’s next level.

Sometimes loving is hard.  People can be mean, rude, vindictive.  Some people seem to thrive on creating trouble for us.  They can be bullies, self-absorbed, manipulative…  Hard to love.

Jesus loved those kind of people, and He commanded us to do the same.

He knew we wouldn’t do it because we felt like it.

He knows it doesn’t come naturally or easily.

It has to be intentional.

It’s a choice we make because we love Him:

“If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”     John‬ ‭14‬:‭15‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”     John‬ ‭13‬:‭34‬ ‭ESV‬

Next-level.

Non-optional… 

If we truly love Him…

…Just a thought…

Yes, Lord. But…

Now there was a believer in Damascus named Ananias. The Lord spoke to him in a vision, calling, “Ananias!” “Yes, Lord!” he replied. The Lord said, “Go over to Straight Street, to the house of Judas. When you get there, ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul. He is praying to me right now. I have shown him a vision of a man named Ananias coming in and laying hands on him so he can see again.” “But Lord,” exclaimed Ananias, “I’ve heard many people talk about the terrible things this man has done to the believers in Jerusalem!”     Acts ‭9‬:‭10‬-‭13‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Second guessing the Lord is apparently a favorite pastime of mine.  So recently when I was reading through the story of Saul’s conversion in Acts, I found Ananias very relatable.

The Lord called Ananias by name.  Ananias responded with a resounding “Yes Lord!”  I mean, when the God of the universe calls your name, what else is there to say?

But then Ananias got some instructions that sent him backpedaling - and fast!  You want me to do what, Lord?!?!

“But Lord!”

Sometimes the Lord calls us to do things we enjoy.  I think He loves to see us doing the things He’s gifted us to do, having fun, enjoying life.  I know I love to see my kids doing things that they’re good at and that they enjoy.  I imagine our Heavenly Father feels that way about His kids.

But sometimes He calls us to do difficult things.  He asks things of us that take us out of our comfort zone.  Why would we not expect that He would?  After all, though we like to see our kids have fun, we know that all of life won’t be fun for them.  Sometimes we ask our children to do things that are hard or unpleasant.  It’s just part of life. 

We don’t always enjoy doing the things that need to be done.  

Like washing the dishes.

Like taking out the trash.

Like paying bills.

Like going to work on a sunny Saturday.

Like going to visit the scary guy that’s been putting Christ-followers in jail.

But I don’t want to.

That sounds dangerous.

What if…

But Lord…

“Go.”

Can’t you just imagine Ananias on the way?

Maybe he was hoping it had all been a dream.  He had to go just to be sure, but maybe there wouldn’t even be a Judas living on Straight Street.  Even if there was, maybe Saul wouldn’t actually be there.  A guy can hope, right?

But faced with the choice between fear and obedience, Ananias chose to obey.

Good choice!

By the time he got to Straight Street, Ananias had to be a little shaky.  He’d probably already stopped for directions and discovered that there was, in fact, a Judas that lived there.  He may have even heard chatter about Saul himself.

Maybe he knew the story of Esther and was reciting her words as he went along, “If I perish, I perish” (Esther 4:16).  Or perhaps Ananias was thinking of Daniel, or of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, or of Jesus Himself, remembering that sometimes it’s important and necessary to do the hard things.

Ananias did find Judas’s house.  He did find Saul.  And - no surprise - it was exactly as the Lord had described it. Ananias laid his hands on Saul. Saul received his sight.  And I have to believe that Ananias’s confidence in the Lord grew that day.

Many centuries later we continue to be impacted by Ananias’s story and by all that Saul would go on to do and write after his sight was restored.

All this was made possible because Ananias chose obedience over fear.  

His “Yes, Lord” trumped his “But Lord.”

I guess this is sort of the “flip-side” to my last post.  Just a couple of weeks ago I was battling frustration with myself over unfinished projects, and I was needing to lean into grace.  I’m happy to report that my screen time has gone down considerably.  But I’ve successfully found other things to be distracted by, and my productivity has not really gone up like I hoped it might.  

And while I can still appreciate grace and the freedom that comes in knowing that God is perfectly capable of getting His work done without me, I’m humbled that He would invite me into that work.  And I’m determined to act on that invitation.

How’s that going, you ask…

Well, I’ve been working on this very blog post since August 4, if that gives you any insight…

I’ve said, “Yes, Lord.”  But I’ve quickly and continually followed that up with, “But Lord.”

But Lord, I’m tired.

But Lord, I’ve got so much to do.

But Lord, I’m distracted.

But Lord, I don’t feel like doing that right now.

But Lord, I’ll do it tomorrow, this weekend, next week — soon.

But Lord.

No, He doesn’t NEED me to do anything.  But I need to be obedient.  And all of my “but Lords”s  are simply excuses for my disobedience.

The Lord didn’t disqualify Ananias over his “But Lord,” and He won’t disqualify us either.  Like He did for Ananias, the Lord may give us a bit more information to encourage us to follow through.  Or He may not.  Either way, it’s time to move forward.

What’s your “But Lord”?  That thing that you believe God wants you to do is really an invitation.  No, you don’t have to do it.  The Lord is perfectly capable of accomplishing His will without your assistance.  But He wants to involve you.  And He wants to make an impact through your obedience.

It’s time to get busy!

The God of the universe has called you by name!  What is there to say but, “Yes, Lord!”?

…Just a thought…

THE THINGS

Thus says the Lord: “Heaven is my throne, and the earth is my footstool; what is the house that you would build for me, and what is the place of my rest? All these things my hand has made, and so all these things came to be, declares the Lord. But this is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word.     Isaiah‬ ‭66‬:‭1‬-‭2‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Do you ever find yourself wanting to do something good but you just can’t seem to get it done?  Maybe it’s just me.  Honestly, it feels like that’s always me!

But maybe you can relate.

As I sit here this second day of August, I kind of feel like I’m recovering from yesterday.  Not that yesterday was technically a bad day.  It was the first of the month, which brings its own special stress as that’s the day all the bills start over.  Aside from that, there was nothing particularly out of the ordinary.  But it was a day that left me frustrated beyond my ability to comprehend.

I confess to having spent a shameful amount of time playing games on my phone.  I really can’t explain why I did that, and it left me so completely frustrated with myself that I deleted a bunch of apps last night before I went to bed.  

Today I’m easing into an attempt at a digital fast (she types into the iPad, lol).  So, clearly it’s not going to be a complete fast, but I’m committed to cutting way back.  My intention was to even do all of my writing with pen and paper, but I decided to go ahead and type the blog post for simplicity’s sake.

And so last evening as my head was spinning and I was berating myself for wasting so much time over the course of this summer - and yesterday in particular - the Lord spoke.  Really, He’d been speaking all day.  I’d been sort of trying to listen, sort of trying to respond… sort of.  Mostly I was making excuses and choosing to do anything but stop and focus.

I’m embarrassed to admit that losing a game is what finally got my attention.  I failed to solve a word puzzle in the allotted number of tries and ended a pretty decent winning streak.  But I wasn’t paying attention because I was too busy being frustrated with all the things that I hadn’t gotten done.

Realizing how affected I was by that silly loss drove me to repentance.

Which was exactly what I needed, however ridiculous the means by which I got there.

You see, I have been so incredibly frustrated at the things I haven’t done this summer.  Some of you know that the book I’d hoped to have published by summer 2021 remains unfinished.  SEVERAL other writing projects fall into that same category.  And I didn’t manage a single post to the blog in the entire month of July.

These things frustrate me because I have never had such a perfect opportunity to write and create as I have had this summer.  I would say that these are things that I feel called to do, and yet I just have not been able to get them done.  

I have been distracted.

And so I am starting this process to try to eliminate some bit of distraction with this “digital fast” I’m attempting.  That’s just a choice I’m making because I think it will help me personally.

But the fun thing about it is that it’s not some “command” from the Lord.  

See, I’ve tried to blame my personal frustrations about my unfinished projects on the Holy Spirit.  I’ve categorized my feelings as “conviction.”  I’ve expended all kinds of energy feeling guilty about the things I haven’t gotten done and about the things I’ve done instead.  My thinking has all centered on THE THINGS - things I haven’t done but should have and things I have done but shouldn’t have.

But that’s not what the Lord is really concerned with.

This is what God told His people through the prophet Isaiah.  God did not need anyone to build Him a new temple, though multiple times throughout history a temple was built and rebuilt.  The Lord was reminding the people that anything they could make for Him would be made of things He’d created.  He didn’t want their focus to be on building, making, or doing something for Him.  

He wanted their hearts.

The Lord was calling His people to confession of sin, repentance, humility, and reverence.  

He didn’t want something FROM the people.  He just wanted THEM.

And He wants YOU.

What God is wanting from you is not some grand gesture or finished product.  He wants your heart.  

That thing that you’ve felt like the Lord wanted you to do and you haven’t done - I want to encourage you today - God’s not upset with you over that!  He’s not checking His watch wondering when you’re finally going to follow through.  He doesn’t NEED you to do anything for Him.  He’s God!  He really can take care of His own needs!

So relax.  Give yourself a little grace.

You can do “the things” someday.  Or maybe you won’t ever do the things. Either way, it’s okay with God.  He can do “the things” Himself if He really wants them done.

But He wants YOU.

Take a moment today and just breathe.  

Take a breath.  Or two.  

Spend some time in the Word.  And while you’re breathing and reading and praying, ask the Lord to give you a clearer picture of what it is He actually wants from you.  

I like how The Message puts Isaiah 66:2:

“But there is something I’m looking for: a person simple and plain, reverently responsive to what I say.”

Be encouraged today, and stop worrying about “the things.”

…Just a thought…

The Day After (When the Oil Runs Out)

For thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, ‘The jar of flour shall not be spent, and the jug of oil shall not be empty, until the day that the Lord sends rain upon the earth.’                  1 Kings‬ ‭17‬:‭14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Today’s reading brought me to some of my very favorite stories in Scripture.  I’m in the book of Kings and found myself in the Elijah stories this morning.

Elijah is one of those characters that I find very relatable.  

Elijah loves the Lord.  He is actively serving the Lord, and Elijah has a very special relationship with the God of the universe!  God speaks to Elijah regularly.

And yet, in spite of the closeness Elijah has with God, he seems to grow discouraged easily and often.  It seems that in spite of all the miracles he has witnessed and been a part of, Elijah sometimes struggles with doubt.

But that’s not the part of the story that’s got me thinking today.

Today I’m thinking about the widow at Zarephath.  I’m not thinking so much about how hard it must have been for her to serve Elijah the bread she made with what she believed to be her last bit of oil and flour.  And it’s not that time when her son died and Elijah had to ask the Lord to heal the boy.  

All of these incidents are amazing and have important lessons for us, certainly.

But today I’m thinking about “the day after.” 

The next day.  The day the rain came and the drought was over.

How did that work?

For the better part of three years, the Lord had been miraculously multiplying the widow’s oil and flour so that she, and her son, and Elijah, and apparently some other folks who were staying with her, all were able to eat in spite of drought and famine.  Then one day God tells Elijah that it’s time to go back, and he leaves Zarephath.  The famine is not quite over yet, though it will be soon.  The widow and her son still need to survive.

I can imagine that this lady must have had a little anxiety about Elijah’s leaving.  His presence served as a visual reminder of God’s provision for her in her time of need.   I don’t know if she had any understanding of the omnipresent nature of God.  She may have feared that the Lord would leave with Elijah. 

But God didn’t leave her.

The Bible doesn’t tell us anything more about this lady after Elijah’s departure.  But what Elijah told the widow when he met her tells us what we need to know - her supplies would not run out until God sent the rain.

So what I’m wondering about today is that next day - the day after the rain.  For the past few years, all this lady had to do was go to her kitchen and find exactly what she needed for the day.  It was her family’s “manna.”  But now the drought is over, the rains have come, and we can ascertain that this is when her supplies must have finally run dry.

Maybe this was a scary day for her.  There’s comfort in the familiar.  For hundreds of days now, she’s had a routine.  She’s developed habits, and those habits have been working.  She and her household have survived many days during which, we can speculate, not everyone had it so well.  But there had been a certainty and a sense of safety for this widow though.  And now that was changing.

Maybe it was an exciting day for her son.  For the past three years his mom had fixed the exact same thing every day.  He probably had grown tired of the same-old-same-old long ago.  Now that the oil and flour were used up, it was time for something new.

Whatever the emotions, and probably they ran the gamut, change was coming.  

They had learned to trust in the provision.  Now it was time to trust in the Provider.

They had seen God through the eyes of Elijah.  He was their “visual aid,” a bodily-present representation of the Lord.  Now it was time to see God with their own eyes,

Charles Dickens might have said, “It was the best of times; it was the worst of times…”  Learning to trust God for yourself - growing your faith - it’s wonderful.  And it’s hard.  

As I was walking Bailey this morning, I was meditating on this story, wondering how I might bring this post to its conclusion and considering its application.  And I was trying to figure out why this aspect of the story matters so much to me today,  And then I realized…

This is a “Zarephath moment” for me.  I’m in a drought, in a manner of speaking.  It’s layoff season from my job.  We’re coming to the end of one month and the beginning of the next.  That’s when most of the bills come due.  And from where I stand, it looks like the oil and flour jars are just about empty.  For most of my life, this situation has brought me to deep anxiety and worry.  Oddly, today I’m feeling less worry and more anticipation.

Here’s what I know: if the oil’s running out, the drought must be coming to an end.  The end of the drought doesn’t mean that the Lord is going to stop providing.  He’s just setting the stage to provide differently.

And I am so curious as to what that is going to look like!

So that is my encouragement to you today - it’s time to get our focus off of the provision and onto the Provider.  

Maybe, like me, you seem to be left with a lot of month at the end of the money.  

Or maybe it’s a relational situation for you. Perhaps you’re feeling that you’ve tried everything you know to do to bring restoration to that relationship.  Now it’s time to trust God to do what you cannot do on your own.

Zarephath is a faith walk.  It’s seasons of learning to trust what you know more than what you see - that the nearly empty jars are going to be enough because God is keeping them from running dry.  And then Zarepheth is the next season of learning to trust that God still provides, even after the jars run dry. He just may do it differently today than He did yesterday.

If the oil is running out, the drought must be coming to an end.

This is cause for excitement!

Celebrate!

And keep watch for something exciting in the coming new season!

Trust the Provider one more time.

…Just a thought…

Rainbows and Promises

Blessed be the Lord who has given rest to his people Israel, according to all that he promised. Not one word has failed of all his good promise, which he spoke by Moses his servant. 1 Kings 8:56 ESV

The Temple had been completed.  The Ark of the Covenant had been placed in the Holy of Holies, and Solomon’s generation had just witnessed the visible manifestation of the presence of the Lord as Scripture records that “the glory of the LORD filled the house of the LORD” (1 Kings 8:11).

This might well be considered the most blessed generation to this point in history.  The Children of Israel were living in the Promised Land.  It was theirs!  They were quite a few generations removed from the days of slavery in Egypt.  These folks had not wandered in the wilderness.  There may have been a few of the elderly remaining who had seen giants during the days of Saul and David, but by and large, these were people who were experiencing days of peace and abundance.

All that these men, women, and children knew of God was what they had been told.  They had not followed pillars of fire and cloud.  They had not gone to battle to drive out the inhabitants of Canaan to claim their inheritance.  It had been passed down to them through their fathers.

While they may not have been the generation that had done the hard work, they were the ones enjoying the benefits.  God had given them rest!

And on this day, at the dedication of the Temple, they saw the Lord.

As we continue to read through Kings and Chronicles, it will quickly become clear that these people did not understand or appreciate the opportunity that had been afforded them.  The people will reject God.  The leaders will reject God.  Ultimately, this beautiful temple will be torn down, and the people will be taken captive again.

Still, 1 Kings 8:56 gives us a beautiful snapshot of the ways of the Lord.  

• God speaks through His servants down through history.  Solomon never met Moses or heard him speak.  But Solomon had been told what God had said through Moses, and Solomon believed.
• God does not want His people to always have to strive and labor and fight.  He desires to give them rest and peace.
• God keeps His promises.  

This third point has been on my mind in particular these past few weeks.  

While the world around us has gone stark-raving-mad in celebrating particular sins, the culture’s choice of symbol is entirely different from what they would claim.

Initially, as I walked around places of business and scrolled the internet, I allowed myself to be annoyed and disgusted at the rainbows that seemed to be everywhere.  But the Lord spoke a simple reminder to my heart - the rainbow is His.  He created it.  He did it so that whenever we see it, we would remember His promise.  

God keeps His promises.

In a world where so much is changing and unstable, that is a sure thing.  He is unwavering and totally reliable.

And so, as we continue through this month that has been geared toward celebrating sin, let each rainbow point you back to the promises of God.  

God keeps His promises!  That’s something that really is worth celebrating, not just this month, but always.

…Just a thought…

Unattainable, Insurmountable… Possibilities

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.     Proverbs‬ ‭16‬:‭3‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I woke up this morning with God-sized things on my mind.  My thoughts are filled with dreams that seem unattainable, challenges that seem insurmountable.  Historically, it’s a thought pattern that has led me down the paths of anxiety and faithlessness.  For the moment, though, I’m simply wondering.

I’m wondering how God might come through this time.

I’m wondering what I should do next - today, tomorrow, next week, next month, a minute from now.

I’m wondering if my dreams are realistic or simply pie-in-the-sky.

I’m wondering if my actions are selfish and irresponsible.

I struggle to balance faith and work.  

My heart knows the God who provides - Jehovah Jireh.  He has provided so many times - miraculously, abundantly.  But He has also brought the manna - just enough for the day.  

Even the manna had to be gathered and cooked.  And when the children of Israel eventually arrived in the Promised Land, there was milk and honey, but there was also work to be done.

I’m in layoff season with my job right now.  I love the freedom of the season, and I find myself trying to figure out how I can have this kind of schedule flexibility all the time.  I’ve been able to spend precious time with family and friends, helping, serving, and simply enjoying the company.  I want to do more of that.  But the problem with the flexibility of layoff season is that it doesn’t have paydays, and on planet earth 2024, particularly in these fun days of shrink-flation, the paydays are kind of important.

I find myself pondering situations that could look pretty bleak if God doesn’t come through.  But really, isn’t that the case with everything?  Without the Lord, all of life is pretty bleak!  So why would I expect my circumstances to look any different?

And so for the areas of concern, I’m trusting God with them.  He does come through.  He always has.  It’s not generally in the time and way that I think things ought to happen, but I pray that I’m getting better at dealing with that.

But beyond the concerns, there are the dreams - big dreams.  I want to be like the lady who I just read is on her way to see my loved ones in Brazil.  She’s going for the tenth straight year.  I haven’t been since 2019.  And so I’m praying that the Lord would show me how to build a life that affords both the freedom and the funding to go visit and serve.

And so I opened my morning reading to a verse I had previously highlighted - Proverbs 16:3 - and I was reminded again of the faithfulness of my good God.

I am committing again my energies to Him.  I am asking Him to show me details of the work He wants me to do and the methods for doing the work effectively.  And I’m choosing to look with anticipation to see how He establishes those plans.  

I’m setting today as an “Ebeneezer” moment (see 1 Samuel 7:12).  The Lord has brought me this far.  I may not know exactly how things are going to come together, but am confident that He will not cease to be faithful.

I’ll keep you posted right here.  That’s really the heart of this blog anyway, to chronicle the wonderful ways the Lord works and speaks, and to prayerfully encourage someone else along the way.

I’m praying that whatever you set your heart to do today, God would bless you in it.  Commit your work to the Lord, and together let’s watch Him come through!

…Just a thought…

Reflecting on 15

I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.     Psalm‬ ‭77‬:‭11‬-‭12‬ ‭ESV‬‬

My Timehop yesterday pointed out to me that I have been writing this blog for 15 years now.  (Upon doing a little research, it actually hit the 15-year mark about a week ago, but close enough!)

15 years!

That seems like an eternity ago.  And like it was just yesterday.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the passage of time…. And trying to redirect those thoughts because they can quickly take me down undesirable rabbit holes…

Fifteen years ago, my life looked VERY different!  My children were 15 and almost 12 years old.  My house had wheels under it.  I was dreaming about a day like today when I would find myself living in a home on a permanent foundation, waking up every morning in the same city, doing a bit of laundry without having to drag it to a laundromat, and preparing meals in a real kitchen with a full-size refrigerator and a freezer that could actually keep ice cream frozen.  Of course, in that dream, the kids were still at home, we were homeschooling the right way in a dedicated schoolroom, there was a yard and a fence… and butterflies and unicorns frolicked out my window, lol!

So much has changed.

The earliest Invisible Woman posts were all composed in different locations across the country as we traveled in itinerant ministry.  Then there were posts from Ellenwood, Georgia where we found ourselves trying to help our church through a transitional period while basically living in the church fellowship hall.  From there we moved on to the Clearwater/Tampa area where we discovered that re-entry after the road years was not going to be as easy as we’d thought, and so there were a few posts reflecting that season. 

Then Raleigh/Durham, North Carolina…

Kenduskeag/Bangor, Maine…

Columbus, Georgia…

Tallahassee, Florida…

Pensacola/Cantonment, Florida…

Brandon, Dunnellon, Ruskin, Ocala…

Lubbock/Shallowater, Texas…

And now Wellington/West Palm Beach, Florida…

Since leaving full-time itinerant ministry, I’ve worked as a daycare assistant (because I wasn’t qualified to work as a teacher anymore 🙄), nanny, burger shop worker, call center customer service representative, behavioral health professional, inventory worker, preschool photographer (two separate occasions/locations), craft store stocker and cashier (also two separate occasions/locations), church directory photographer, children’s home houseparent (three agencies, four locations), fast food worker, photographer’s assistant, school photographer, transcript editor….   (And then there were the hundreds of other jobs I was turned down for along the way!) I joke that I’m still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up!

It’s been an action-packed fifteen years, for sure!

I’d really like to thank the handful of people who have stuck with me on this journey.  I’ve yet to write anything so interesting or profound as to go “viral” or even be widely shared.  But through all of the moves and jobs, this little blog has been one small constant through a whole lot of change.

If the next fifteen years are anything like the past fifteen, it’ll be quite a ride!  I’ll keep checking in here from time to time.  Though my life has involved a lot of change, my God has not changed.  My life is a lot less public than it used to be, but my heart’s desire is still that my life would reflect Him to others.

Blessings!

With Benefits

He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities.    Psalm 103:10 ESV

Today is the kind of day I’ve been waiting for - a kind of laid-back, free-to-do-things day, and so far, it’s off to a good start.  In the course of life, moving across the country, and jumping right into long, hard work days, I’ve fallen behind in my Bible reading plan.  This morning I was able to get in a couple of extra days’ reading, so I’m finally feeling like I’m on my way to catching up.  And though technically I’m still behind, I feel like today’s passages were exactly where I needed to be today, so I guess I’m right on target!

Which is exactly what I am seeing in the Scriptures today!  My big God has EVERYTHING under control!  Little ol’ me can’t mess things up so much that God can’t accomplish His will.  And His timing is always perfect.

Thus I found myself reading Psalm 103 today.

Side note: I memorized this Psalm in elementary school.  I am SO thankful for the blessing of those years in Christian school where memorizing scripture was just part of the curriculum.  Those verses remain firmly planted in my heart and mind, and the Lord continues to use those words to guide and encourage me all these years later.  As life happens in the course of the day, He is able to bring to mind those verses that speak to me in the moment.

Anyway…

I was reading the assigned passages from April 29, looking for my “God shot” (that’s a term from The Bible Recap plan I’m following this year, challenging readers to view Scripture from the perspective of what it says about God rather than how it applies to us personally).  The funny thing is that my “God shot” was about how even the Psalmist took note of how following God benefitted him personally.

Certainly, following, serving, worshipping the Lord is all about who He is.  He is Creator, Eternal King, Father - so many names and nuances.  He is worthy of ALL glory, honor, worship.

I am worthy of death and hell.

And yet…

The Eternal King of the Universe knows me, loves me, saved me, and offers little me big benefits.  BENEFITS!

The Psalmist lists just a few of them:

• Forgiveness
• Healing
• Redemption
• Love
• Mercy
• Satisfaction/provision
• Renewed strength 
• Righteousness
• Justice
• Grace

He chose not to deal with me according to my sins.  He elects to not give me what I deserve! 

“Forget not all his benefits.”

I forget.

Sometimes I feel like all I ever do is come to God asking.  I also come to God complaining and doubting and questioning, expressing worry and concern.  How silly of me!

As the Psalmist notes, God’s got all of the “stuff” under control.

ALL OF IT!

Last week I paid rent.  That sounds like a pretty normal thing to do, but it was not at all normal.  It is hard for me to wrap my brain around the going rate for housing in 2024!  Before we made this most recent move, I argued with God about the impossibility of our being able to afford to live in south Florida.  I reluctantly consented to go, but I really didn’t see it working out.  I figured to go along for the ride, and then find a more sensible, affordable plan.  

But God made bank!

I just love how His benefits are not limited by my unbelief!

“He does not deal with us according to our sins.”

A little over a month into this new adventure, meditating on Psalm 103 today, there is freedom, and blessing, and so much hope!  

That doesn’t mean that life won’t still be hard or that there won’t be struggles.  None of this is about me.  It’s all about my faithful God.

Today, I simply want to bless Him and not forget His benefits. 

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy Name!

…Just a thought…

Weepy and Broken

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.     ‭‭Romans‬ ‭8‬:‭28‬ ‭ESV‬‬

This morning finds me still a bit weepy from the emotional roller coaster on which I found myself yesterday…. Meanwhile, this post may stray a bit from my usual format.  Today I bring you part movie review, part reflection, and, prayerfully, part encouragement.

One of my favorite bands has been making a film over the course of the past few years.  I’ve been eagerly awaiting its release.  Yesterday, we took the time to watch said film.  I was entertained, inspired, informed, and basically reduced to a blob of emotional goo.  So much in the film hit so close to home for me!  

The movie is Unsung Hero, produced by the Smallbone family.  If you are at all familiar with contemporary Christian music, you will probably be able to identify this as the family of the band For King and Country and solo artist Rebecca St. James.  The film chronicles the family’s journey in moving from Australia to the US, and it walks viewers through some of the struggles they faced and some of the obstacles they’ve overcome.

Without revealing too much detail (because you really should see this film!), while in Australia, Mr. Smallbone made what would turn out to be a very costly business move that prompted him to seek out a new opportunity in the States.  With his pregnant wife and six children, Smallbone journeyed to the US, only to find that the opportunity he’d been offered was no longer on the table.  And so the family found themselves basically broke and stranded.

Wow, did that hit home for me!

Learning to live on very little, trust God’s provision, and become humble enough to accept help from others - these are hard lessons.  Watching these scenes play out on a large screen took me back…

To the Walmart parking lot in a city where we’d never been, where we were out of money, out of gas, and basically stuck after an opportunity had been cancelled last-minute…

To the church parking lot where we sat regrouping, not knowing how we were going to move on with a vehicle issue we could not afford to fix…

To the roadside where our vehicle caught fire…

To so many moments where I wondered what impact my life choices were having on my children, praying the Lord would protect them from bitterness and resentment, and that He would somehow supernaturally enlighten them with knowledge and wisdom when my parenting and homeschooling efforts fell so short, so often…

As we drove home yesterday, there wasn’t a huge lot of conversation between Jeff and I.  But we talked a little…

“So that one mistake [choosing to do such-and-such with so-and-so] is what really messed them up,” Jeff commented.  “And then when [so-and-so did such-and-such] when they got to the US, that just sealed it for them.  I can’t believe he did that!” 

Initially, I was tempted to agree.  That’s how I would have seen it in the moment.  “It was MY mistake.”  “HE put us in a bad situation.”  

BUT…

On this side of the story, I can see things very differently.  “Mistakes,” struggles, letdowns, scarcity - all of these were steps along the road that has given the world the music of Rebecca St. James and For King and Country and movies like Unsung Hero and Priceless.  Had David Smallbone’s life and career gone as it was “supposed to,” many, many lives would be different.  

Including mine.

The film kind of broke me, but (I think) in a good way.  I was reminded of God’s faithfulness throughout our adventurous life thus far, and reminded that my God has not changed.  My story may not be as dramatic as some, but the story’s still being written.

And that would be my encouragement to you today: your story is still being written.  The mistakes of your past are being redeemed by God in ways you may not be able to see just yet.  What someone did to you set in motion the series of events that brought you where you are today.  It may have brought you in touch with people you would not otherwise have met, or it may have taken you to places you would not otherwise have gone.  And maybe it still doesn’t feel like a good place or situation.  Just trust that God is using it.

Because He is.

HE IS.

Hang on, my friend.  Hang on.

…Just a thought…

PS - If you knew us during the road years, there’s a very particular vehicle in Unsung Hero that looked VERY familiar and left me wondering…

Monday Morning Quarterbacks

“What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed, and in that I rejoice. Yes, and I will rejoice.”     Philippians‬ ‭1‬:‭18‬ ‭ESV‬‬

About a week and a half out from the Super Bowl…

Maybe it’s just because of who I am and who I know, but there’s only one commercial I still see people talking about.  And love it or hate it, I think there’s significance in the fact that it’s still being discussed.

I hadn’t planned to weigh in on this.  I find it odd, a bit disheartening, and very telling that so many professing Christians seem up in arms over a simple commercial that was seen by millions of people around the world.  The ad depicted an important character quality of Christ (and presumably of Christ-followers), directing viewers to a website where they could learn more.  How is this a problem?!

I have seen Christian leaders blast the commercial as heretical and blasphemous.  I’ve read dozens of takes on what “should have” been said.  I’ve even seen some remakes of the commercial, labeled as “better” alternatives to the simple, thought-provoking ad that was broadcast.  I’ve cringed and wanted to weep.

If anything, from where I stand the response to the “He Gets Us” campaign illustrates well why such a campaign is so important.  He “gets” us; clearly we [professing Christians] do not “get” Him.

In case you missed it, the ad in question depicts foot-washing.  That’s all it is - a commercial depicting foot-washing, which Christ Himself modeled for us.

“But Jesus washed the feet of His disciples.  He didn’t wash everyone’s feet.”

He washed the feet of Judas.

And Jesus told the disciples that He did it as an example for them to follow.  He was calling them to service and to humility.

Judas and the coming betrayal was on Jesus’s mind when He was washing feet.  He knew who Judas was.  He knew what Judas was going to do.  And He washed his feet anyway.  And He told His disciples to follow His example.

The “He Gets Us” ad was designed to point the lost to a place where they could hear/read the gospel message.  It was designed to get people’s attention, depicting EVERYONE as loved and valued.  

Mission accomplished!

In my opinion (and it’s just that - my opinion), the underlying message of the “He Gets Us” commercial was more for the professing saved than for the lost.  Why have so many Christians gotten so offended by this?  

Personally, I got convicted.

I have little interest in football.  I have even less interest in professional football, and actually have a general dislike for the NFL.  But watching the Super Bowl commercials has become somewhat of a tradition.  So I was paying attention when the commercial aired early in the game.  I was silenced by the powerful message I saw playing out on the screen.  And there was an inward “ouch” that followed.

This was not, from my perspective, a message of “Jesus just loves and accepts everyone and their sin.”  It reminded me that Jesus did, in fact, love and serve all kinds of people - in spite of their sin.  He did wash the feet of His enemy.  And He told His followers that they should do the same.

But we don’t.

At least, I don’t.

Not always.

Sometimes, I’m just a little too aware of other peoples’ sins.  I try not to, but I still jump to conclusions about peoples’ character based on their appearance.  I classify and categorize and make assumptions when what I’m actually called to do is to serve and to share the love of Christ.

You know - Christ - 

Jesus.

The Savior.

Emmanuel, God with us.

The One who was made like us in every respect.

He washed Peter’s feet - Peter whose faith failed him out on the water.

He washed Thomas’ feet - Thomas who was going to have some doubts about the resurrection.

He washed the feet of all of the disciples who were going to abandon Him just a few hours later.

And He washed Judas’ feet.

He also sat at a well and talked to a Samaritan woman.

He touched lepers.

He defended a woman who was caught in the act of adultery.

He got His hands muddy to restore the sight of a blind man.

He went to the homes of society’s outcasts.

Yes, lives were changed when Jesus touched people.  But He did not wait for them to change before He touched them.

He went where broken, sinful, dirty, sick people were, and that’s where He touched them.

I love to hear testimonies of people who have been saved and delivered from the sins of the past.  Absolutely!  So I can rejoice with the “former” dealer, user, addict, prostitute, thief, murderer, abortionist - whatever anyone’s past that the Lord has brought them through and forgiven them of - PRAISE THE LORD!

But we mustn’t lose sight of the fact that the Lord didn’t require them to clean up their lives BEFORE He saved them.

So go ahead and share the video of the “formers.”  Those testimonies certainly should be shared.

But whether or not you think the “He Gets Us” message will draw people to salvation, at least let your own heart be touched by the message that following Jesus requires that we approach those unlike us and that we love and serve them.

…Just a thought…